Bring on the New Year

I'm not really into the whole traditional "New Year's Resolutions," but I am excited about some changes that  2012 is bringing with it. I'm excited about meeting my new baby GIRL for one thing. That's right, I found out on December 20th that our next child is a "she." I was definitely expecting/mentally prepared for another boy, so it's taking some getting used to... I actually feel a wee bit nervous about raising a girl - like I will have an even greater responsibility to her than I do to JD (which already feels pretty huge). You know, to truly show her how to be the woman God created her to be, to value the right qualities in myself  so that I can set a healthy example for a girl growing up in a world that often values women for all the wrong things, to be a mother that she wants to be like instead of one she wants to be the opposite of. I have never felt particularly gifted in these "leadership" type areas, so I know I have some work to do. But while I'm nervous, I am also excited about the opportunity to grow and be stretched because I have always found that when I set out to teach something, I'm usually the one that ends up learning the most. Not to mention the fact that we had the perfect boy's name picked out and we're stumped for girl's names... So becoming a family of four - that's one big, obvious change that's coming this year.

There's another, more subtle, change that I feel is going to be coming this year as well. For the first time in quite awhile (probably since moving to Austin and having JD, in fact), I feel excited about my relationship with God. I realize that this sounds extreme. It sounds pretty bad. But I'm just being honest. I don't think I've been "far from God." I haven't been doubting Him or angry with Him or rebelling against Him. And I've even seen Him answer prayers, provide for our family, and work through our little church community, The Grove. But I haven't been "close to God" either. After some personal reflection (which does not come easily or naturally to me) I think there are two main things that have contributed to my general apathy in the spiritual arena. 1.)When we left South Carolina, we left behind a strong group of spiritually like minded close friends who constantly encouraged me to push deeper into God, to expect to hear from Him, and to change in order to become more like Him. We moved here to Austin, an awesome city where we did not know anyone. So that was different. 2.)Then I had JD and I began to value things like sleep, having a clean house, and getting back in shape more than spending time in the Word. I have been waaaaay more disciplined in working on my physical fitness than I have been in working on my spiritual health. Without even realizing it, I started to believe this lie that as a mother, in this "season of life"  I did not really have time to read my Bible on any kind of consistent basis anymore. I did have time to sleep in on Saturdays (thanks to my amazing husband), clean and organize my little house (I don't like to use the word "obsessively"), and train for a half marathon, a triathlon, and my personal best 10K though.  Looking back, I feel like these two factors combined to lull me into a state of complacency in which I was okay with where I was in my relationship with the Lord. And it wasn't a bad place, but since it wasn't really going anywhere it has become rather stagnate. In addition, I am realizing that I had begun to equate how much "doing good for others," serving, volunteering, etc I was doing with my spiritual well being. And being a mom has put some limits on how much of that I am able to do. So I was subconsciously accepting the fact that my  relationship with the Lord was just going to be "on hold" for awhile. When in reality, I am slowly waking up to the fact that perhaps God intentionally has me in a place where I can do less so that I can just be with Him more. All of this long-windedness to say that, thankfully, in the last couple of weeks, God has been doing something in me. I'm so glad He doesn't leave everything up to us! Right now, I am just in the beginning stages of realizing and admitting where I am and asking Him for the desire to grow. And I can already tell that He is answering that simple little prayer. I think He has been waiting for me to pray it for a while now. So that is the second change that I am looking forward to in 2012!

There are a few other, smaller, things I'm excited about this year too. My friend, Sarah Ashlin, has inspired me to new levels of organization. (Those of you who know her might not believe me, but it's true!) This Saturday morning I took all my favorite cookbooks to a nice little coffee shop overlooking Lake Austin and planned out a menu for the week. I typed it out, complete with recipes, and made a grocery list accordingly. Now it is printed and hung on a piece of cork board on the inside of a kitchen cabinet door (thank you, Pinterest). I plan on doing this every Saturday morning until I have about two months worth of meals to rotate through, and I expect it to save us time and money and help us to eat more well-thought out, healthy meals. (I am happy to share meal plans with anyone who wants some new ideas, btw!)

Speaking of healthy meals, I came across this article today while browsing Facebook. In a nutshell: DO buy organic milk (if you must buy cow's milk at all), organic potatoes and apples, grass-fed beef and wild Alaskan salmon. DO NOT buy canned tomatoes or microwave popcorn. Yes, some of this will most likely be more expensive. But partially through experience and partially through researching and educating myself on a very  basic level, I have come to realize that we will either spend our money at the doctor's office or we will spend it at the grocery store. Either way, we will be spending it. Food (see Michael Pollen's In Defense of Food for a good definition of real food) can be pricey. But it is worth it. I plan two to three meatless dinners every week (breakfast and lunch are almost always meatless anyway) so that when we do eat meat we can afford to buy the good stuff. We are still learning and probably have a long way to go on the healthy eating front, but we will be taking more positive steps this year.

I do love a good project and along with having a new baby comes the perfect opportunity. Redecorating JD's blue and black room and turning it into a fun neutral nursery for the two of them to share (once baby starts sleeping through the night, that is)! I am formulating a rough vision of what I want it to look like and collecting ideas from Pinterest, IKEA, Pottery Barn, etc. My mom comes for a visit in March so I'm going to put her to work helping me bring it all to life. And, as always, I have a mental list of home improvements in mind. A new lamp here, a rug there, some plants and patio chairs, a painting I've been meaning to do for the living room, and a slipcover for our couch that has seen better days... My focus has shifted to waiting for good deals and buying more "quality"  items rather than running out and buying the cheapest thing I can find as soon as I get an idea (and then not really liking it or having it break). So patience will be a virtue in this area. Sigh. Not a strong point.

I have also decided that I want to spend more time doing the things I want to do instead of wasting time not doing the things I want to do. Ha! This will be pretty simple (well, at least in theory) because it mainly includes cutting out a lot of Facebook time and TV time. I usually end up mindlessly watching HGTV and TLC shows one after the other or twiddling around on Facebook until like 10:30 or 11 at night when what I really wanted to be doing was blogging, reading the Bible, finishing a good book, calling or emailing a friend (instead of FBing them), keeping up with the journal I started about JD, having glass of wine and a conversation with my hubby, making muffins for the next morning, doing yoga, taking a bath or just going to bed early (8 is a good time!). The fact that we are cutting out cable will help with that. I plan on choosing one show to watch per week (The Biggest Loser starts tomorrow and it will most likely be over just in time for Dancing With The Stars to start up again... hee hee).

It seems like there are more changes to look forward to, but it is getting late and the only other one I can think of is laundry. Oh, Laundry. How I despise you! But I plan on changing my relationship with laundry by actually doing it in a timely manner. My goal is to just do some (a load or two) every day (or at least every other day), fold and (sigh) yes, even put it away that same day. Perhaps that will eliminate the procrastination to actually put laundry in the washer due to the fact that I know there is still laundry in the dryer from a week ago that I will have to fold and put away in order to dry the load I am starting...

Oh and last but not (by any means!) least -  maybe, just maybe, 2012 will bring the advent of JD being able to stay in a nursery (any nursery! church would be amazing; the gym would be down right miraculous) without standing by the door wailing, sobbing, calling pitifully for "Mommy!" and insisting "All Done! All Done!" the entire time. Please God!